I feel quite sick. I just cannot settle tonight. I did drop off to sleep but I had a nightmare. I’m now awake again feeling stressed. I keep dreaming of Prison and just memories of that place make me feel unsettled. It wasn’t the worse one that I could have ended up in but it… Read More Tonight is not a settled night.

I have felt exhausted all day due to lack of sleep but I have managed to get a lot done. I’ve sent my Ebay parcel (someone brought the handset that I purchased by accident). I just need to update the status of delivery and tracking number when I get home. I’ve popped into the library… Read More Today has been a reasonable day… for a change.

There is something that really continues to bug me and causes me a lot of hurt. I struggle with this one thing because of what has happened. The feeling that in comparison to others I’m undeserving. Or that I deserve less than others to certain people. It’s not fair. I’m deeply affected by how I’ve… Read More Things are annoying me tonight.

Today is one of the time to talk day nominated by the mental health charity, Time to Change. This has happened to coincide with the anniversary of my Father’s death. He passed away 9 years ago today. I don’t know whether that is a sign that he approves of what I’m trying to do in… Read More Time to talk – 7th February – current challenges relating to my PDA side (and PTSD symptoms combined).

I have made the decision to access all my records in the entire system (social services, NHS, schools etc). In this current stalker awareness climate with all the media coverage on the television I need to prove that I am not like those that are shown on those programmes. I am not capable of most… Read More I have to take a brave step.

I was unable to sleep again last night. I just cannot stop worrying after things that have happened. I just live my life fearful of people now. I feel absolutely horrendous today because I’m extremely tired. I had an appointment that wasn’t optional this morning. I am just not able to cancel it because its… Read More Barely slept and woke up feeling horrendous.

I am watching this programme. I was one of these children way back before it became an issue that people started looking into. I was never home schooled but I was excluded from formal education as a child (due to not having an Autism diagnosis until after my school years were over). I never got… Read More Dispatches: Skipping School – Britain’s Invisible Kids.

I decided to try Reflexology today. I was getting no joy with the GP every time I went to them about my various problems I’m experiencing in regards to horrendous monthlies etc. I was feeling ill nearly all the time so I had to try other things. The fact that I was exhausted all the… Read More Well that’s another mystery officially solved….

I have thought about what would make it right for me to be able to move on from the past. The only thing that could possibly at least dull the pain of my past is apologies from all those that let me down growing up. The local authority for letting me down in regards to… Read More I’ve thought about it and this is simply all that I need to not be affected by the past.

  The first photo (one in the purple top w/blond hair) is a photo was taken 3 years ago. The second photo (one in the pink top w/mint hair colour) was taken today. I am really disappointed at myself for letting that much fat accumulate around my stomach. I don’t want to look so thick… Read More Fat Analysis…. 3 years ago vs now.