Wrapping up autism awareness / acceptance month…

Sorry this entry has been delayed due to feeling emotionally drained and getting a migraine. I think many of the autistic community are glad that autism acceptance/awareness month is finally over. This month has felt so long. Mentally I think it is a month that drains me emotionally due to my son’s birthday and the fact that because he got adopted I haven’t seen him since 14 months old. I don’t even get letterbox contact because I fought the adoption and the local authority said that I could potentially destabilise the placement if I was granted any form of contact. It was wrong what happened. I can’t change the injustice even though it still hurts me. I don’t feel that autism awareness / acceptance month really changes anything. We don’t get heard when we speak regardless of whether it’s on the designated month. We get talked over, ignored etc. There is bullying between the different parts of the autism community. That is being done by autism mums to autistic adults. I saw something pop up on my twitter feed about a situation that kicked off. There is enough bullying going on without in house issues. I see this month marked as autism awareness / acceptance every year. Then nothing changes. How is that productive? Why even have it if society isn’t going to be more accepting and supportive to autistic people. I’ve had my own situations. I explain that things got said because of how my autism reacts when I get upset but nope I’m never forgiven just punished. It’s not an excuse. I apologise for everything I’ve said when upset. I try to explain things to help others understand. I’m just not heard, ignored etc. I saw one case online which happened during this month. The organisation which was where this person worked was actively promoting autism awareness/acceptance while at the same time sacking the autistic person for not speaking to a customer correctly. It doesn’t seem to actually mean anything. It’s just a form of tokenism created by the equal opportunities campaign. If you’re not going to listen to us or hear what we try to explain then what is the point in having this month? I know that others don’t want to deal with another’s neurodivergent tendencies but everyone needs support. I try to support neurotypical’s need’s despite not being able to understand them sometimes. I find that stressful. That pushes me to burn out and probably brings on my migraines. I make that effort. We just want some effort in return. We just want to be heard, not have our rights trampled all over and be seen as an equal human being. That isn’t a lot but in neurotypical society that seems like a lot to ask. It’s actually the bare minimum which is freely given to neurotypical people. Imagine not being able to understand the language that is spoken by others. The logic that is theirs not being logical to you. The inability to learn that language because it goes against your nature and if you try to speak that language it feels unnatural to you to the point it actually causes long term damage. That is autism from the inside. Please listen to bloggers like me, vloggers and autistic people in every day life. We need to listened to otherwise we have no chance of being understood let alone not being punished for our autism by others.

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