Still awake… I think my intuition missed something important.

I’m cold (seriously my lower body feels like ice) in my nice warm bed. Logically that should put me to sleep easily… nope. It is so annoying. I think I’ve worked out why my ‘gifts’ are keeping me awake. That side of me can lay it on severely if I don’t listen soon enough. I wish that I hadn’t said certain things because I feel punished. However, thing’s probably would have turned out the same anyway. Some things are meant to be because of how other people are. There was no avoiding what would eventually be. If they have said things behind my back to make other people treat me badly then they would have always found a way to do that, even if I hadn’t been brutally honest with them. I should have listened to the vibes I picked up when I first met them. I thought I felt uneasy because I liked them. I was so wrong. Their energy was off. I’m not being mean. People can’t help being that way. It doesn’t mean that they are bad etc. Some people just can’t do empathy and sympathy is needed way too much in this world, it ends up exhausting giving that out. I’m supposed to not have empathy as an autistic person… I seem to have a lot more than some undiagnosed people. Hopefully now that I’ve listened to my intuition it will quit keeping me awake because that’s getting in the way of life stuff. I can’t stay that way. It is impossible to function properly.

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