Late night thoughts… it’s ridiculous and doesn’t make sense.

I’m awake again but my sleep pattern is a complete mess. I’m watching bbc I player on my phone. I was thinking about life. You know what my brain is like at stupid o clock. I evaluate every single detail in my head of whatever I may be thinking about. They say that everything happens for a reason. I agree that at times the reasons are probably that I’m a stupid person but maturity takes time to reach. We meet everyone for a reason. I believe that this has been the case recently. I changed as a person when I met someone and it was only when things went wrong between us that made me change. It hurt me but I needed those words to stop me ever quitting antidepressants. The other person may have been a bit abrasive and cold but maybe that is what I needed to stop messing about in life. If you do learn the lesson though, aren’t things supposed to go back to normal between people? I know I can’t push that but I’m sure that if we worked it out then as individuals willing to collaborate it would be good teamwork. We are similar but different in some ways which means together we can prop each other up in weaker areas. If it was meant to be then what was the point if it was going to fall part long term.