It doesn’t matter why you blew it, there’s no second chance.

The world doesn’t care about autism : mental illness. That means they’ll certainly say the line “stop using your condition as an excuse”. That comment really used to hurt me until I stopped looking at it from purely an emotional standpoint. If you want to try understanding neurotypical thought patterns you’ll have to think of it from a logical standpoint. They are very much a one strike and you’re out kind of community. They are unable to see how we can’t behave in ways that they don’t want in their lives. It doesn’t look like a form of psychological programming to them, they see it as a purposeful act. That is because they can put on acts quite easily. They don’t see that we can’t so easily. I have tried but it doesn’t last long. I do want forgiveness for things I may have said while off antidepressants and for the past to be put behind us. The anger I had and what I said due to it was completely my fault for coming off antidepressants and refusing to go back on them. That is exactly how others of neurotypical thinking would see it. They’re default attitude is … you’ve made your bed, you can now lie in it with the permanent consequences.