Can’t sleep, I feel stuck.

I’m too fed up to actually sleep. I feel like I’ve been given a life that I don’t particularly want. It’s the same shit, different day kind of thing and it’s getting so boring. I like routine. I want a change though. I feel like I’ve missed out on life. I need to break free from this life I currently have but it is extremely difficult. I don’t have the confidence. I’m still broken after things I’ve been through… however, I don’t think I will ever not be broken if I don’t strive for a different life. Different things and routines could heal me. I realise that I don’t have much to offer anyone or anything at this point though. I get too tired to do stuff as well.