Still not eaten but back from walk. I’ve technically proven that no one listens to me.

I came back from walk because it was getting late and it’s not that cold but as it got later I just wanted to go home. Walking isn’t going to change other peoples minds or the facts of a situation. I’m hurt and it will probably leave a mental scar like the other times in my past but I’m mature now so just got to bury it with the adult pleasures in life… alcohol, painkillers. I am not having any of them tonight because it’s not the weekend and my finger and knee are much better from a previous dose I took for this mornings migraine. I’m now in the bath and have another early start because the washing machine guy is plumbing in the new one and taking the old one. I have a whole load of washing waiting to be done but it’s a 10 kg one so I will be able to fit all that in there. I put oil in my hair because it’s gone so dry to the point where it has crinkled like Afro hair. I think that it will have to be left on overnight because it’s that dry. I have proved that people don’t listen to me… yet again. They only hear when I get mad and say things that were meant to hit a nerve (literally it’s the only way to not be background noise). I either get not listened to because I’m female (yes, the patriarchy attitudes do still exist in places), I’m autistic (person with a disability) and the fact that I look really young. I have absolutely no sense of authority looking like a child. In general it is a thing that older people do not listen to the younger generations. I accidentally do the same when listening to people in their teens and early twenties talk. That is for a good reason though. They don’t have as much life experience. I know that by 35 you’re not quite at the older and wiser stage but I only talk about the things I know. I’m reluctant to go outside the scope of my own experiences because I’m not qualified to do so since I haven’t been through them. Now I’m seen as a bitch but I’ve proven my point.

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