I’m probably going to get comments back telling me that I’m punishing myself continually but that’s not the case here. I was effectively punished for life when they took my son for adoption. They wouldn’t even let me have contact which would have been at least humane. I was NEVER a danger! It was just assumed that I couldn’t do it because someone who didn’t even know me made that decision. Those were from notes I found out wasn’t even true as the years went by. This isn’t fair. I’ve seen really awful people be able to keep children just because they’d never been under the system for anything. I am fed up with being punished for who I am. They’ve given me a life sentence that is going to cut deeply in me forever. I have even seen people on drugs and addicted to alcohol keep children because they know how to fake drug tests and be sober when social workers visit. Those that actually abuse their children are very clever in how they prevent the abuse from coming out. Those children never get taken away. Then there are going to be those that say people with mental illness etc do get to keep their kids. There is a small proportion of that group who get to keep their children. They are very lucky and some have had previous children who have been taken away but been allowed to keep others because of circumstances. Even if my circumstances wasn’t to their liking they could have still given me some form of contact. It’s too late now because I’m technically a stranger to him after not seeing him since 14 months old (he’s now 10). That isn’t something that can be fixed now. I’m always seen as not good enough to have anything.