People just don’t ‘see me’.

This is a problem that my dad also had because he was a quiet and short person. I seem to be getting it too. It worked for him because he didn’t have to be seen for what he did as a job. Social media is all about being seen. I have to do that to keep blog visitor numbers up. I have put up the best photos I have. I’m not keen on taking more right now. I haven’t changed a lot apart from a bit of weight gain. I want to be seen but not be recognised in the street when I’m trying to do everyday life. I fell asleep at dinner time. I only had one blog view since then. It’s ridiculous. Why can’t I be seen? Why does there seem to be a shield between me and the outside world? I know it’s something to do with being shy and quiet. Dad was the same. The only time people saw while waiting at a bar was when I wore heels when I went out. I don’t know what the equivalent of heels would be for no one looking at what I create. New visitors can always flip onto old posts and read them because the algorithm then pushes my blog link more out there which in turn brings more new visitors. Even those that have been reading a while can read the ones before they started reading. The only ones that can’t really do that is the ones that were here right from the start. There isn’t many of those. I’m completely fed up of not being seen or even being respected as a person. Some people get that effortlessly… some just naturally get ignored and told that we aren’t good enough to be given respect or shown that we matter. We literally have to beg for kindness and acceptance. I wouldn’t mind but there are people who are actually terrible characters who others crowd around. Is the being mean, keep them keen thing a real way to draw people in? I bet that tactic wouldn’t work for me. I would just get called a load of horrible things and get blanked. I try to be nice but I get absolutely fed up with being treated not even as an option. I just don’t ever get seen as a person. I only ever got seen when the system was making money out of what they did to me. That is all anyone sees … I’m not a person or others couldn’t be so mean and cold to me when I make myself seen. Then others make sure I’m not seen again.

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