Day: November 26, 2022

  • How am I supposed to feel?

    When certain conversations and circumstances come together which make me feel like crap it is really triggering for me. I don’t want to go into it fully but via email I get someone tell me they don’t mix professional life with personal life. Client is a client nothing else as that is how they met […]

  • I hate it all… you want my honesty, this is exactly that.

    I’m aware that this is going to confuse many people who are just social creatures in general. I absolutely hate all that, but I want to no longer be alone etc. I actually hate other people as a whole due to how they’ve treated me in the past. I have a natural avoidance thing there […]

  • You’ll never know what this is like…

    People always go on about holding on until life goes the way that you want. I did hold on for that point but those things were taken away from me due to how my autism affected me. I’m never going to get those chances again. I have basically nothing for the rest of my life. […]

  • I’m more fed up than I have been previously.

    I’m sure that many others with the BPD side can relate to being in constant emotional pain under the surface a lot. That gets worse when there are triggers all around which normally happens towards times like Christmas. I’m strong to a point because I’ve had no choice but emotionally, I have been tired for […]

  • I didn’t sleep for long.

    I slept for a few hours but woke up too soon to feel like I had actually slept. I will probably try to get back to sleep for a bit after posting this entry. I feel like I’m wasting my life. It’s just not changing despite the effort I try to make when I’m not […]