I need a rest.

I know that many find the lengths of my long walks impressive, but I can’t do them anymore. I’m extremely tired and mentally they’re not doing me any good. The things that bug me just bug me more walking miles. I have bags under my eyes due to my horrendous sleep pattern. I also end up making myself too wired to sleep when I walk miles most days. I only ate just over 700 calories today. It wasn’t intentional, it’s just how it worked out. I try not to go too low because once I start eating more the weight spikes back up. I don’t think my cat has got many years left so I have to spend time with him too. He’s had issues and is wanting to cuddle up on my lap every night which isn’t his normal self. I could take him back to the vets but as he gets older, he’s going to get worse. He’s middle aged in cat years already. I don’t want him to be put down until it’s kinder than letting him keep living with what issues he keeps getting. He is grumpy a lot but doesn’t look in pain at the moment. I don’t want to lose him because he’s my best friend. The other cat is aloof so she’s friendly on her own terms. He has always been friendly, naughty and sociable. I’m too mentally tired to keep doing long walks. I end up doing nothing else which leads to no changes in my life. I need to start doing other things so that I’m not stuck in a mental prison created by my past. I will be stuck in it if I don’t do other stuff.

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