I am ok now. I still can’t sleep but that is a regular issue.

I just got an email back confirming that I didn’t need to be anxious. I’m fine now. Well, I can’t sleep because insomnia and my toenail is growing into the skin on my foot (which is why I have the appointment tomorrow) but my head isn’t all over the place now. This is exactly why I need to meet up with A and tie up loose ends from that situation because it affects me to the present day. I know she doesn’t like me, and I don’t like her after what happened, but I literally can’t trust anyone since. The smallest of things make me overthink into some kind of scenario that is completely wild. It only takes something small to trigger that kind of thought process. It doesn’t make sense… none of the entire situation with A made sense either. That is why my head gets into that anxious making up potential narrative’s mode. I have met decent people since meeting A but they had to also deal with that anxiety when I first met them. They no longer have to tell me to chill out because we have known each other long enough to get over that trust hurdle.

Author: Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert

A blog written by a female diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome but suspected PDA in more recent years. Musings of a Trainee Battleaxe was created to not only create awareness of the PDA part of the spectrum; but also to educate the public hopefully creating understanding in order to stop future generations being let down and labelled negatively. Disclaimer: There may be parts of this blog which viewers may find upsetting as it contains accounts of real life events which have been quite traumatic. However, it is all to help create a sense of understanding and combat the fear surrounding all aspects of mental illness and Pathological Avoidance Syndrome (a very little understood part of the autistic spectrum).

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