I should be happy about my achievements but I’m just not.

The certificate I got from the completion of my open university modules is something I should be happy about but I’m just not. I didn’t finish the whole degree due to my brain not being able to do it. That is the bit that is standing out to me at the moment. I’m so tired that I’m tearful. I live in a chaotic mess. I’m never going to get things sorted out from the past that I need. Others got told lies to make it seem like I was being unreasonable, so I got treated in a certain way (seems likely the case from what I’ve found out). I woke up with an achy knee and my finger swollen again. I don’t even care about getting my certificate because my life sucks. I live in messy grubby surroundings because I’m always too tired to do housework. The certificate doesn’t improve my life right now. The fact that I also didn’t finish the whole degree because I found it too hard also bugs me. I feel like the certificate is literally barely anything. I haven’t achieved anything positive in my life. It’s just been a long list of failures and dead ends.

Author: Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert

A blog written by a female diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome but suspected PDA in more recent years. Musings of a Trainee Battleaxe was created to not only create awareness of the PDA part of the spectrum; but also to educate the public hopefully creating understanding in order to stop future generations being let down and labelled negatively. Disclaimer: There may be parts of this blog which viewers may find upsetting as it contains accounts of real life events which have been quite traumatic. However, it is all to help create a sense of understanding and combat the fear surrounding all aspects of mental illness and Pathological Avoidance Syndrome (a very little understood part of the autistic spectrum).

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