Torturing myself on a nightly basis.

I have tried so hard to disconnect myself from any lingering energies so that I can move on enough for my current life not to be affected by what happened with A. I just can’t stop laying awake on a nightly basis. It’s torturing my mind every single night. It’s not been this strong in my years. There’s got to be a reason why it’s got really intense recently. It can’t be running only one way. A must be feeling something too. I always knew that we were supposed to meet for whatever reason. This is the kind of thing that happens when that scenario happens. I need a proper sleep pattern. I cannot stay this way. I won’t be able to function in my life properly if this happens every night. I can’t do relationships much due to what happened with A because it’s made me fearful. I need to be released from this hell. I let go but I’m still connected by energy so whatever I tell my mind it doesn’t matter.