Fate being different could have changed my life completely.

This isn’t specifically getting at the NHS but it’s saying what happened in a series of events led to the reality that I find myself today. The NHS didn’t find what killed my dad in 2010 and to be honest the treatment they gave him for his lung condition was basically a load of medications with further side effects causing other secondary illnesses. If they had provided better more appropriate treatment that didn’t result in things getting worse for him then he wouldn’t have passed away so soon at just 62. He had not long come out of hospital before he passed away. If they had done a full set of tests they would have found what was lining up to cause his death. They didn’t check anything they just probably looked at medication and sent him home as soon as possible. If dad hadn’t passed away then him and mum would have moved up north to the seaside place which was the retirement plan. Then I wouldn’t have been forced back here with my son due to social services telling me I had to move in my mum when I was due to have him. I wouldn’t have had the stigma or be retraumatised by the memories of growing up here. I wouldn’t have been labelled the same way I was growing up here because there would have been no old shit in a new area. I wouldn’t have met certain individuals who are happy to still be living in this god forsaken area. It’s a shit hole with barely any funding for the NHS services or anything else. We were always the area who got less than anywhere else in the country. If dad had not died we would be happy rather than living this stuck miserable life. I’m brutal with the truth and personally I hate feeling stuck. That is my reality now because I simply cannot afford to up sticks and move away.

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