I couldn’t sleep again.

I slept a lot during the day before going out later. I thought that I would sleep because of having to carry back my shopping in such a tiring way due to bag breaking. I had two packs of wkd blue this weekend on Friday night and last night. I make it a rule that I only touch alcohol on weekends. I normally go to mums for Sunday or Monday lunch depending on energy levels so in reality it is only two nights a week. I started to feel fat despite the scales not spiking too much. I keep weighing myself to make sure that I don’t undo progress. I noticed it has gone up a lot so I did some exercises during the night. There is no way that the scale will not go down again now. I need to lose 3 more stone to be at my comfortable weight and the ‘average weight’ that they say a female should be. I have to keep taking it down by calorie control and exercise each week which will take me three to six months depending on how many treats like alcohol I cut out for a period of time. I like drinking but hate it at the same time. The hangovers are brutal now I’ve got older. That puts me off drinking but I also feel chilled out which makes me want to not quit it completely. I am at least not drinking it every night like I used to during the pandemic and a year afterwards. I have to limit it anyway because the estrogen was giving me huge thighs. They go up temporarily when I have a few packs.

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