I need to do stuff but I don’t want to face the trauma.

I really don’t think that it is a good idea that I do tackle certain things while injured. I’m supposed to be resting and recovering. I’m not recovering anyway because the past is keeping me awake. I have to act but also just looking up the paperwork for the ref number associated with the restraining order etc will cause me mental trauma which I don’t want on top of how it already keeps me awake at night. I know that I have to go back to court at some point to fix this. I know the people listening to the case for removal will look at me as scum automatically when I walk into the place and it will take a lot for me to talk in front of whoever is hearing it. It will also take a long time to get a hearing because the courts are literally backed up (well, the criminal courts are… civil court probably is too). I’m stuck because I know what I have to do and it’s going to traumatise me either way. If I do leave it, I am forever kept awake by it. If I do get all the paper work together and make an application (the fee could also be a lot unless I show proof I’m on benefits) then that is still trauma because I’m having to relive it.

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