I got up extremely late after straightening the frizz out of my hair last night. The cat woke me up early in the afternoon puking up a hairball in my kitchen. She then proceeded to go do a huge dump in the litter tray (well next to it because her aim isn’t good). I got… Read More Today has been quiet.

I have increased the amount I drank of alcohol recently. It crept up again along with the scale numbers. I don’t enjoy alcohol any more. I just end up really anxious and unable to sleep. I now need to push the scale back down and never actually make any progress. I hate myself for deciding… Read More I need to stop drinking alcohol.

I saw people in the autism community talking about a celebrity couple split. Names weren’t mentioned but I googled it and more information came up so I know who now. Their names are initialed here because they are long to spell when writing a blog entry walking. I am not going far due to aching… Read More The PMG and CMG marriage split.

Nearly 26,000 steps in only 2 ish hours was a bit too much in such a short time yesterday. I ache so badly today. I can barely walk around yet because my legs and feet are that sore. I managed to get food and feed cats but that really hurt. I took a painkiller last… Read More Tired and ache badly.

I used to be so into fighting for justice and whatever else. I can’t do any of that any longer. I am tired and in pain. I don’t have the strength in me to fight for any cause any longer. I am that emotionally tired and physically tired I am crying. I am fed up… Read More I’m in pain and tired.

I haven’t had the energy to do another bleaching session on my hair. I slept until really late yesterday and didn’t go for a walk so I had some energy stored. I have to bank energy nowadays because my natural setting is exhausted. I have just washed off the bleach. It is ok but still… Read More Sleep pattern out of whack so using my awake time productively.

I want to no longer hate A. I am always going to be pissed off about what happened. I can’t remember half the stuff that happened due to being traumatised. I think that I was in a mental haze for at least a decade after my son got adopted. I am still glad that I… Read More I no longer want to hate A.

I was browsing through tiktok earlier this evening. There was a video come up about a forced adoption. The woman said they’d just heard a woman come out of a courtroom screaming after the judge had just ruled a care and placement order in the local authorities favour (which means that they can place the… Read More Retraumatised all over again.

I went back to the gym today. I can’t say that I enjoyed it but the air conditioned environment was nice to be in for a few hours. I looked in the mirror and realised that I have hair to shave off my face above my lips again. I only did it last week but… Read More Hot, tired and fed up.

I haven’t gone far in over 3 years and it shows. I am too tired to get up today. I had a major headache last night so had to take a painkiller before I went to bed. The heat had really got to me. I couldn’t cool down for hours even in front of the… Read More I’m totally wiped out after yesterday.