Dead inside.

I may be physically alive but I have felt dead inside for many years. I sometimes don’t even feel present. I really need sleep but that isn’t happening yet. I have been dead inside since my son’s adoption. I am always elsewhere in my head. I forget chunks of things that happen. I have since read that all these things are a result of going through trauma. I never got rid of this part even on antidepressants. I died mentally years ago. I physically am alive but it is only existing. I am always lost in my head and sometimes I question if I really exist any more.

Author: Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert

A blog written by a female diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome but suspected PDA in more recent years. Musings of a Trainee Battleaxe was created to not only create awareness of the PDA part of the spectrum; but also to educate the public hopefully creating understanding in order to stop future generations being let down and labelled negatively. Disclaimer: There may be parts of this blog which viewers may find upsetting as it contains accounts of real life events which have been quite traumatic. However, it is all to help create a sense of understanding and combat the fear surrounding all aspects of mental illness and Pathological Avoidance Syndrome (a very little understood part of the autistic spectrum).

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