It has become apparent that I will never get the respect that I have been trying to earn for at least the last decade of my life unless I show some kind of leadership instead of being passive and accepting of what is right now. I am tracking down the person in charge of 117 section aftercare discharges tonight and make contact tomorrow via phone, backing it up with a written request for a discharge meeting tomorrow. I am sick to death of being treated differently by people when they find out who I am. It only comes in handy for instantly stopping men (and some women) fancying me who I don’t fancy. There is no other good point to it in every day life. People with long term physical conditions don’t have to put up with being put under clauses. I refuse to put up with this bullsh*t. The next stage after coming off that clause is going back to every single place that has ever punished me (asking me to leave etc) due to aspects of my autism for historical info which led me to being on that aftercare thing for years. I won’t even ask for compensation only written apologies. I am not after money. I want the respect and place in society that I have been denied since a teenager due to circumstances.
I really want another chance from my friend who stopped speaking to me at Christmas. I am going to break it down here. I never made my mistake on purpose. I have an innocent thought pattern which didn’t see anything but trying to help. I have never been in a relationship. I avoided it all. I have no idea how all the social crap works. I never made my mistake out of malice or anything negative. Life stuff really confuses me. I cannot stand how the adult world seems to be. The way people hook up with others loosely then move on from exes so easily. Hurt each other without even giving a shit. If you find something long term it is worth it but some of us will never have that due to being naturally socially rejected due to autism etc. Please give me another chance because coming off antidepressants is hard enough on my own. There ate people around me but they don’t get what it is like to live inside a head with mental illness.