Things could be better.

I am at the part of the journey for quitting alcohol and coming off medication (antidepressants) which is quite hard. The adjustment that my body is going through is making existing quite tough. I don’t know whether the level of antidepressants going down in my body triggered my monthly to come on early. That is still continuing to batter me. I thought that the worst had passed but earlier it did the clot thing again. I should be nearly done with it by day 4. I was really swollen around my abdomen (posted a video earlier on socials) when it kicked off. I am hoping that it gets better after remains of iron tablets leave my body. They should be gone by the time I come on next month. I am expecting to feel rough and tearful coming off of antidepressants. That is a thing that happens. I am just going to have to roll with it. I keep getting that way but I can cope with the process. I won’t lie. It is feeling like a battle at times. I cannot recommend ditching medication. I would be irresponsible to say that. I have regular blog readers that are taking psychiatric medication who would be unable to function without them. I wouldn’t be coming off antipsychotics because that isn’t safe unless a person is in a secure environment where they can be monitored. Antidepressants are more manageable to deal with out of a secure setting. In this climate where seeing or speaking to a GP is a difficult process I am tapering off them myself hoping that it works. I don’t expect it to be easy. The task is going to be a challenge with ups and downs. I had to accept my reality and what my life always will be before I could even start to come off of them. The antidepressants only mask the sadness that I feel about aspects of my life. Taking medication isn’t a solution to any of that. I let all my experiences of discrimination and bullying win if I stay on medication for life. I also don’t want to be accused of pill shaming for having the view that I want to come off my medication. This is a personal decision and has nothing to do with my beliefs.

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