I am quite pissed off right now because I had just fallen asleep and the cat woke me up wanting to come inside. He is still being a pain by making chirpy noises and strolling around being destructive. I am hoping that he has an energy dip and falls asleep because that will mean I can sleep in peace for the next 6 hours (once asleep both cats don’t stir for many hours).
I feel like releasing a truth bomb. l won’t try to be brutal but honest because I cannot pretend any longer. I am not doing myself or anyone else any favours by remaining passive and sorry for my part in things. The other person will never reflect on their own actions if the truth bomb isn’t told. I only did what I did because I wanted a bit of give on their side of the friendship to me. I was giving everything while they just took. I thought that if I tried to help by talking to their son it would heal something between them and that in turn would also make them appreciate me. They were getting more distant before going offline during Christmas. I was feeling like they were just taking, didn’t appreciate me and that I meant nothing as a friend. I knew that the only thing I could possibly do to get them to appreciate me was try to fix a connection that they valued. Instead, I found out that I was never going to mean anything to them. They referred to me as a stranger during our last message etc before telling me to basically go away forever. The things that were said hurt me a lot. I have held back on the complete reasons behind my actions because I was hoping my worse fears about this other person wasn’t true. I am now realising that they used me. They never planned to really meet up with me at some point and certainly had no intention of ever giving back in the friendship.