Cutting alcohol to help sleep properly.

I had a drink last night when I got home. Then I couldn’t sleep, so tonight I haven’t had alcohol. I feel less wired and more relaxed so should sleep soon. I feel self conscious about my weight so am refusing to step on a scale or measure myself for at least a month when hopefully I have made a lot of progress. I stepped on that scale once and it went up 2lbs … that has led to this avoidance. I do NOT want to see that again for a while. I cannot deal with it. I get angry with myself when I do not progress or relapse into weight gain in this case. I am extremely strict and hard with myself. I tell myself that being this size is not me. I look too chunky when larger due to being naturally curvy and short. I have probably put myself back to being larger again due to having to rest completely for a few days. I need to ease back into the gym tomorrow after doing what I need to at home.