I have a feeling that there are things I do not know that was going on behind my back. I have had enough toxic stuff in my life over the years. I don’t feel that I have been kept in the loop when people did talk to me. I don’t trust easily due to my life experiences. I also don’t want to assume that before I messed up anything there were friendships that weren’t actually real. Or things were being said about me behind my back? I feel humiliated despite not knowing any details. I have an intuitive feeling that just doesn’t sit right with me. I am fully aware that no one is perfect. The train wreck of my past is an example that some of us were merely a constant walking disaster (I still can be on a lesser scale). I am afraid of potentially awful things being said behind my back. Others making out that I am someone who I am not. I have moved on but literally petrified that I am being made out to be some kind of terrible person behind my back. People have done it to me in the past and now there are certain people I simply don’t trust due to things that have happened and also things I accidentally found out.
I live a half public life due to the blog but all I ask is that others don’t make assumptions and spread those opinions. Those things tend to end up being seen as the truth by people who do not personally know me. I have one simple request that people refrain from doing that sort of thing.