My head is wrecked right now.

I am wrecked since I watched that video on TikTok. The fact that I am just some random internet person when the friendship meant something to me cuts me to shreds emotionally. I wish that others could like me the way that I like them for once. I am fed up of meaning nothing to people I try to form friendships with. I know that people say stuff they shouldn’t when they are angry. I still believe that I meant nothing to them though otherwise they couldn’t have walked away so easily. Comments like I will be here for you and help you were just throw away statements. They definitely aren’t helping me by acting the way that they have been since it happened. I’m autistic and I needed them, the support that they said they were going offer me. If I didn’t have that autistic streak then I wouldn’t have made the decision to do what I did. She knows I have a form of autism. I don’t do malice but those comments where she discarded me has caused me damage. That is going to really negatively rip my mental health down the drain now.