I was in a live on TikTok but I generally feel like this on every day life. I tend to hang with people who have mental health problems or autism. I really don’t seem to fit into any particular category. That is a lonely life on the sidelines. I struggle with different aspects of life due to my brain being slower. I socially don’t fit with others who have mental health problems. I can’t fully relate to the autism specific struggles. People make assumptions that I am really intelligent due to being autistic (Asperger) but that can’t be further from reality. I am not very bright due to being on epilepsy medication that I didn’t need as a child (misdiagnosed). That was strong and stunted my brain at a time when it was still developing. I ended up with my behaviour issues manifesting shortly after being taken off that medication.
I don’t feel like I am on the same intellectual level which is frustrating. I am slightly intelligent with learning issues but not enough to be that autistic or have proper learning disability. That makes me feel extremely left out and am constantly misunderstood by others because they just can’t see where I socially fit. I honestly can’t see where I fit either.
Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert Blog 