Things that aren’t right.

Mainstream media always features the do gooders within our system that are part of the problem. I’m never on the right side despite fighting for positive changes. Those who have propped up the systems wrongdoings (maybe ignorantly but it doesn’t matter for this particular point) are the ones praised. Even if I’m doing something positive it’s always turned around because I’m refusing to be part of the system which have inadvertently destroyed lives (including my own) and I also cannot be part of that system because of my labels, such as the record I was given. I hate how both sides point blank refuse to work together. I don’t particularly want to get both sides linked together to reform the system. I would rather spit on certain people I’ve come across… I have done certain things because I know that there is no other way to push for reform. Unfortunately you have to be part of the system, even joined to it in our case. The only way to change attitudes and promote changes over a long term basis, so that it’s moulded into something a lot kinder than it is right now, is to work together. No disputes, no arguments over who is wrong or right. They are all negative things that won’t result in what is needed. I understand why there is so much hate and sometimes fear within the current system. I feel upset, hurt and angry about my situation. I cannot do the things needed if people are constantly feeding the system with negative emotions. If anyone knows anything about the law of attraction, spiritual rule that negative feeds negative outcomes. If you’re going to carry bitterness and hate into the goal of changing the system long term then it just won’t work. We may as well quit right now if everyone has a wall up against each other for whatever reason. Most people are older than me fighting for these changes. Yes, life has probably treated you like absolute crap but that is all the remainder of your lives is going to be if you don’t quit acting childish and technically keep your enemies close. The system and the people who work for it are the enemies because they caused our pain. You have to use your anger and convert it to be your drive to force common ground to mould the system if necessary. I feel like my life constantly revolves around damage control and stopping people trying to take each other down. Your anger is wasted and causes law of attraction problems. We can’t have that if you’re going to be involved in moulding our current system by working with those people we have good reason to hate. Look at what I’ve been through. I have so many reasons to have an negative attitude towards working with the system to modify it. We certainly can’t do anything about the stuff that has happened and continues to happen unless we loosely join forces. I’m definitely not saying we have to fake being nice, just don’t let yourself feel hatred while we’re trying to do this.

Author: Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert

A blog written by a female diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome but suspected PDA in more recent years. Musings of a Trainee Battleaxe was created to not only create awareness of the PDA part of the spectrum; but also to educate the public hopefully creating understanding in order to stop future generations being let down and labelled negatively. Disclaimer: There may be parts of this blog which viewers may find upsetting as it contains accounts of real life events which have been quite traumatic. However, it is all to help create a sense of understanding and combat the fear surrounding all aspects of mental illness and Pathological Avoidance Syndrome (a very little understood part of the autistic spectrum).

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