Hidden disabilities: I let the autism hate get inside my head.

I know that this sounds ridiculous but I’ve only just realised there is a genuine hate towards autistic people within society. I’ve always been open and honest about my disability with everyone I’ve met. I didn’t believe that conscious bias was a possibility. I didn’t understand how people can be intentionally unfavourable to someone who is autistic. I blamed myself for how I was treated and labelled. It has destroyed me. I never felt the damage for years. I truly believed that I was an evil person before I started talking to others they had been treated similarly. I don’t even want to go out the door on the days that it is affecting me the worse. I pick the skin on my face because I have internalised that hate. I can’t get rid of the hatred for myself despite knowing it’s not all my fault. People only want us to exist when we’re doing something useful to them. That is what you do with objects not people.