Just please don’t today okay.

I cannot stand hormones and how they make me look fatter the I probably am. The bloat makes me look pregnant when I know that I’m not! That depresses me after what I’ve been through in my past. Their they know me are aware that I want another child but I’m not sure these it’s ever going to be a good idea for me. I’m not complaining about the amazing ever expanding cleavage that my weight gain is producing. I’ve gone up in bra size several times over the last year. I’m just not sure to being larger. I’ve always been the petite little one apart from the time I was 21 at a size 16. I never had boobs this size at that age. I have never needed to worry about that area of me being too small but I’m worried as at the moment I seem to have a sinus/ear infection and I’ve bloated a lot in just a week. The neck ache that I think I had was related to that issue. I have scabs in my ears which isn’t that comfortable. I look like the walking dead today because all my mascara has shifted into my skin around my eyes. I have gone out to get some stuff for my ear because that is really blocked up and sore. If I can get rid of the crap in it then I’m sure it will be more comfortable at the least. I really don’t feel well today but that is normally when I’m a day from starting monthly. I keep seeing skinny women and really missing my former figure. I know that some may want my curves but I don’t like myself right now.