I’m going to bed early. I just can’t do anymore today!

I m already in bed despite getting up later. I just don’t like even being awake today. I’m hoping that I wake up in a better mood tomorrow. I’m trying not to feel bad about being depressed. It’s hard though. I know it isn’t a choice but I feel responsible for not being able to stop feeling that way. I don’t feel like doing anything. I had to push myself to go out to get petrol and a few bits from the supermarket today. Hand gel is making parts of my hands extremely sore. I just can’t right now. I’ve never felt this way even at my worse times so far. I have honestly been avoiding a full on breakdown for quite a long time. I don’t know how I would come back from one. The services for mental health aren’t great around here. I can only get around one by self help.

Author: Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert

A blog written by a female diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome but suspected PDA in more recent years. Musings of a Trainee Battleaxe was created to not only create awareness of the PDA part of the spectrum; but also to educate the public hopefully creating understanding in order to stop future generations being let down and labelled negatively. Disclaimer: There may be parts of this blog which viewers may find upsetting as it contains accounts of real life events which have been quite traumatic. However, it is all to help create a sense of understanding and combat the fear surrounding all aspects of mental illness and Pathological Avoidance Syndrome (a very little understood part of the autistic spectrum).

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