I’m not able to concentrate until after I’ve had the vaccine on Friday. I’m far too anxious to even concentrate on anything. I just want to flit from one thing to another so that my mind isn’t still enough to remain worried. I only have one day left to distract myself. I can’t not be worried. I don’t understand the chemicals that is going to be injected into me. I’m the kind of person that has reacted to the antidote after I overdosed on painkillers. That was only stuff to detox my liver. That went straight into my veins as a drip. If I hadn’t told them I couldn’t hear then I may not be here now. They had to give me an antihistamine injection to stop my reaction. I just want to get it done but at the same time I don’t want to go through it. I’m fed up of the current situation and this is the only way we are going to be able to end this nightmare. This is the weirdest existence ever at the moment. If my dad came back now he would see an alien world. People in masks, social distancing, pubs closed, even his railway visits couldn’t happen during this lockdown. The previous version of existence seems like a long time ago. Many of us have got so frustrated by living under restrictions that we have become heavy home drinkers. I have tried to cut down but the Downing Street briefings are trying mentally without alcohol. There won’t be an end to this situation until most of us have vaccinations. I wish there was a better option. I can’t see another way to get back to some form of normality.