I decided to go for a walk because I needed a few bits that I stupidly forgot on the way around yesterday. I’m warm in my thick coat but it’s colder than I thought when I walked out my door. I only went around the block tonight. I don’t feel the cold but realise how ice cold I feel when I get home. I have gloves which I can use with my phone screen. I just don’t wear them. I don’t like the feel of gloves on my hands.

I have my vaccination booked for the end of this week. I have had my invitation because I’m in the extremely vulnerable category. I’m taking my mother with me only because she also had a letter due to her age group. I’m not going to say that age specifically otherwise I may get in trouble. We may as well get vaccinated on the same day as then we are both done… well we will have had our first. We have to go back for the second dose in may.

Lack of sleep and morning cat antics.

I didn’t get to sleep until morning. Then I was woken up by one of the cats loudly digging the litter tray followed by a smell of poop. The litter tray is scattered everywhere. I can’t see where he’s used it, I can just smell it. That shows he’s buried his business properly. That doesn’t always happen so could have been worse. I got up to have breakfast and my medication. The cats have gone quiet again now. Mister decided to start a fight with Mimi which I had to break up. It wasn’t a full on fight. Mister was trying to you know what what with Mimi and she wasn’t going to let him. They’re brother and sister but that means nothing to cats. They are both neutered so can’t do any damage in that department. Mimi is now snuggled next to me on my bed. I opened the window to let out the smell so she’s probably cold.

7th Feb… 11 years have gone too quickly!

It’s the 11th anniversary of my Dads death. 7th Feb 2010. Ironically it was a Sunday back when it happened. I am just awake not really thinking about the date. I put my mind off of the anniversary by doing some well over due cleaning around flat. It smells so lovely in here now. The cats are inside tonight due to the weather being wet. I think that they know there is snow coming. That is the only time they don’t want to go out. I am half glad that I’m not where I was in life 11 years ago. I was in the residential home for autistic people. I moved out later that year to my own flat down south. That wasn’t so bad.

The last decade has been quite rough in general starting from having to move back to where I grew up, my sons adoption and everything I have experienced in between which wasn’t helpful to my mental well-being. I’m hoping that in a post covid world is more understanding when it comes to mental health, autism etc. I’m hoping the majority understand. I know that there will always be those who don’t understand. We have lost so many people to the virus and suicide. Change should happen in memory of all those lives. It wouldn’t feel right to just go back to life as it was previously. Many people won’t be able to return to the same reality as they had before the pandemic due to losing family and friends. Grief stings less over time but never truly disappears. It does get better, there’s no time limit, everyone experiences it differently.