No one understands, this point is valid.

I don’t want to offend anyone by writing this post. I want to be honest about life being autistic. I think my sleep issues are relating to how others treat me. I can’t put a stop to that. I can at least put it out there for others to think about in their own time. I know I’m hard to like alongside my reputation but it doesn’t change the point I’m trying to make here. Many autistics find that they are treated quite unfavourably socially due to others assuming that we do not feel normally or equally. I’m here to confirm that the above is incorrect. I can’t put it anymore plainly otherwise I’m verging on being too ‘in your face’ with my point of view. There are many unwritten rules when it comes to socialising. There is one major ‘rule’ or assumption that personally hurts me like a knife being constantly dug into my skin. The fact that those diagnosed with autism, mental illness etc are seen as below the undiagnosed (aka the normal). It’s too late for me not to be open about my diagnosis etc. Although, I absolutely categorically can confirm that if I had my life again then I’d never honestly disclose anything. Too many people assume that autism means that a person is dangerously unpredictable. The media have only reported on the minority of cases which were along those lines. We are told the rules but they only seem to apply when people want to acknowledge it. An example is some tutors at college back when I was doing my GCSE’s added other students to social networks but wouldn’t add me. Then they’d give the line that they weren’t allowed to add students to those online forums. I’m fed up of being treated like I do not matter or even exist. Especially when I see others getting treated better in similar positions. I feel unwanted, unworthy of love (well, friends) and I’m just not able to be an equal. The fact that people don’t even give me a chance sometimes isn’t fair because I don’t get an equal opportunity. I may be quiet in person but that doesn’t make me potentially dodgy. I’m a nice person when people bother to get to know me. I’m direct sometimes but this comes from how I’ve been treated. The attitudes, discrimination and assumptions that I have to deal with in life keeps me awake. I can never settle either. The way things do not change really affects my mental health negatively. Then people don’t get to know me because I just isolate myself.