What is sleep? I cannot remember.

I couldn’t get to sleep during the night. I briefly dropped off but woke up after only an hour. I’m starting to get affected by lack of proper sleep. I am also exhausted after 3 weeks of continuous disturbed sleep. I’m just unsettled more than normal because life is just odd right now. I feel like I’m clinging to the little energy I have and being unable to function. I naturally feel things which I’m trying to filter out but it’s not that easy. I don’t think that I will be able to sleep properly. I never feel like I’ve actually slept because all my sleep is inconsistent. I woke up with a sore throat. I don’t know whether that is lack of sleep related. I have a runny nose due to hay fever anyway. The warm sunny weather is welcome but the allergies that come with that particular season aren’t very pleasant. I need a walk as I’m starting look quite pale. I don’t go out every day to exercise because I am quite tired. I have bits like cat food food delivered too which takes off the trips to the supermarket. I am trying my best but it feels like it will be this way for a long time. I’m hoping that I can avoid going completely mad waiting for the lockdown to be lifted. I don’t even feel like social interaction. The constant tiredness is making me want to be on my own. Social interaction, even via online, is tiring for me. I haven’t got the spare energy built up  to be social in any form. I need this time as a break. It’s peaceful and the every day outside world pressures which were there before the lockdown.

Author: Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert

A blog written by a female diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome but suspected PDA in more recent years. Musings of a Trainee Battleaxe was created to not only create awareness of the PDA part of the spectrum; but also to educate the public hopefully creating understanding in order to stop future generations being let down and labelled negatively. Disclaimer: There may be parts of this blog which viewers may find upsetting as it contains accounts of real life events which have been quite traumatic. However, it is all to help create a sense of understanding and combat the fear surrounding all aspects of mental illness and Pathological Avoidance Syndrome (a very little understood part of the autistic spectrum).

%d bloggers like this: