I’m not looking forward to the next few months.

I am quite afraid of what might happen in the next few months. I know that none of us is comfortable with the next few months. However, I fear the most about not even going to be able to go for a walk. Other countries aren’t letting people go anywhere at the moment. I spend a lot of time inside in a form of self isolation due to my autism. The thought of not being able to go out for a walk just to get out for a while makes me feel uneasy. I feel things naturally in normal times. The intenseness out there in the outside world is not what I’m used to picking up. I’m afraid of how things are going to progress. This isn’t anxiety. These are my ‘gifts’ coming into play because of the unprecedented events that are currently occurring. I’ve not had many nightmares but the worse part is being awake during the day right now.

People think that my ‘gifts’ are something that make me weird or insane at the best of times. I can contain it in normal circumstances without that side of me getting intrusive. I can’t shake the feeling off that things are going to get to that stage where we literally become prisoners in our own homes whether we have the virus or not. I won’t be able to cope with being stuck in one place constantly. I have to be able to get out even if its just for a walk.

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