Today has felt short but also long… let me explain why.

I got up twice today. Once this morning and this afternoon. I was woken up by a Jehovah’s Witness this morning. I answered it because I was expecting post that might need my signature. I was pleasant to the man that was at my door but didn’t let him go on for a long time. They have a script. I usually let them introduce themselves and their message. Then I simply tell them that I don’t believe in anything. Basically it seems like today’s visit was to tell people that the awful things happening in the world wasn’t gods fault. They’re talking to someone who is more aware than most of these things. I don’t know whether I can call myself blessed to be one of those that dream life events before they happen. I can literally feel evil energy that hangs around people and places. I may not believe in a god but I feel whatever surrounds us. I had a migraine when I woke up and didn’t sleep until late. I took my antidepressants and returned to my bed until later in the afternoon.

I then woke up to discover that I still had a migraine. The weekly food shop needed doing because I barely had anything in the fridge. I was relieved when my car started with no issues today. I wasn’t up until it was getting dark again. Luckily, I didn’t have a lot to do today so I was able to be lazy without getting behind. I’m trying to rest more until the start of the new year. Exhaustion isn’t the way to start a new year, especially since it’s a new decade in a week. I was 22 at the beginning of the last decade but now I’m 32 (and I feel old in comparison). I was fatter than I am now at the start of last decade. Skinny is something I will never be but I’m at least 5 stone lighter than I was at 22. I’m on less medication a decade later, barely drink alcohol and exercise more nowadays. I can’t believe that my dad has already been gone for a decade. It doesn’t seem that long ago. Time seems to have gone at record speed during 2019. I was only saying a few weeks ago that it only seemed like a couple of months since last Christmas (2018).

I went to a relatives house this evening and never got home until quite late. The car decided to throw a wobbly on me when I started it up to come home. It still works but it’s showing up faults at least once a day. I’m hoping to get someone to check it over soon. I was glad to get a bath and get to bed tonight. I still have my migraine but drinking water to try to not wake up with it tomorrow.

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