I made it to the end of the day.

I had to go for a few hours nap when I got home. I tried to stay awake but the lack of sleep I had last night caught up with me. The cats joined me (as usual). They’ve woken up for something to eat and gone back to sleep. I’ve had a bath, washed my hair and watched some television. I really want long hair but it’s getting a handful when I have to wash it already. I have times when it gets really matted. Then the ends get tangled together quite a lot. I have to wash it in three stages. Shampoo, conditioner and deep conditioner. I can’t leave it to dry naturally because it frizzes outwards. It’s about a three hour task if I do all washing stages and styling together.

I really need to start writing a book because I keep putting it off. I had a few ideas today but never wrote it down… again. I forget them and then I’m not disciplined enough to set aside a time each day to make myself put any effort into making ideas in to some form of book or at least an outline. We can use things from our lives but converting our memories into a book and adapting them to flow for someone that didn’t live through certain experiences is extremely difficult. I’m no good at explaining things in every day life at the best of times.

Stressful morning!

I only remember having approximately no more than two hours sleep. I was up by half seven to take my relative to their hospital appointment. The infirmary is far too big now. We got lost on the way out and my relative got angry at me because I was meant to be leading us back to the multi story car park. They also can’t communicate properly due to being quite deaf now which made it more complicated. I have just got back to their house to have a cup of tea and something to eat. I have to eat with my medication otherwise I wouldn’t bother because I want to get back to my home as soon as possible.

I got an email sent to my phone while I was in there telling me that I had ran out of credit on my meter and it had decided to disconnect after going into emergency credit. I have my laptop at my relatives home so I’ve topped up but when I get back I will need to get into the meters to reset them. I left the boiler on but the thermostat off which I’m hoping isn’t going to break the system. I will be in serious trouble with my landlord if it did break because they’ve only just been put the new boiler in. It shouldn’t if I turn the button off before I go into the meters. I am sure the cats will be surrounding me for food too when I walk in the door. I just want to go to sleep after I’ve sorted everything out.

Anxious. I want to go home so badly but I can’t.

I don’t like staying the night away from home. I’m too anxious to sleep tonight. I have to stay where I’m driving from tomorrow. I’d rather be with the cats because I’m so used to them being at home with me. I don’t like leaving them over night either. I have fed them etc but I still don’t want to leave them. I have been on edge about plans all day. I can’t wait until tomorrows commitments are done and I’m back in my familiar environment. I have worries to that I cannot go into on here.  Things can get so much worse starting from what is happening tomorrow. Tomorrow could just be the beginning of an awful time. I may end up totally on my own and there will be more appointments in the meantime. There will be so much to sort out in general. I can’t wait until tomorrow is over and I’m back home recharging for whatever may happen next.