Reconsidering my options taking into consideration my strengths and weaknesses.

I found out that I’d failed my Maths Level 2 Functional Skills portfolio exam that I finished when I was in Prison. I am now reconsidering my options because I’ve been trying to get my Maths levels up for two years now and still getting stuck on certain things. This is an area in which I struggle because of my learning disabilities. I don’t want to spend years on my weaknesses. It is soul destroying every time I don’t get a pass or am unable to work out certain topics. I could spend years trying to get the grades and still never pass because of my learning disabilities. It’s boring trying to repeatedly do something. I’d rather focus on my strengths in areas where I can actually make progress.

I am just stressed out trying to pass Maths level 2 qualifications. I do not enjoy it at all and it actually gives me Migraines. Most of the adults I know don’t have passes in that level of Maths and it’s not that problematic for them because they do work in other areas. I just feel like I’ve wasted enough of my life attempting to pass it. I tried my best but my brain just can’t do Maths properly. They keep making it harder year after year which makes it even more of a struggle for me. It’s like a form of torture for me. Apparently you need GCSE Maths now but as a ‘mature student’ which I am just about classed as under the new criteria I could probably do a degree without having to pass Maths. I would probably have to do an Access course first but I’m not up to any of that at this moment in time.

I need a break from education at the moment because it’s stressful for a person with PDA. I’m stressed enough as it is right now with benefit changes and various crap that has gone on in my life. PDA type Autism makes you get judged ten times more in the education system. I’m not up to coping with that judgment right now. The last thing I need is another jumped up tutor taking offence to me and destroying my life. Or other students freezing me out because they see that I’m different. Until it’s safe for those of us on the PDA part of the spectrum to participate in education and any group activities within society without fear of bullying or accusations then I can’t risk it.

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