I can’t make people listen to me. I don’t have the ability to ‘influence’.

I have tried my best over the years to get people to hear what I’m trying to say in regards of what it’s like to live with Autism. It normally falls on deaf ears. Others don’t want to listen if they’re not directly affected by Autism. Why would they? It isn’t a part of their life. They don’t see it as their problem. I don’t feel that we will ever get others to understand. It’s hard for neurotypicals to see our point of view. Many of them can’t think ‘outside the box’. I wish that I could do more but I don’t have the influence out there. Some people just have the influence to sell things to the public. I’m normally ignored. I just don’t have ‘it’.

I have spent my life feeling invisible. I’m never the one that gets noticed or given the opportunities. I’ve had to fight for everything I have managed to get in life. I know that this is down to my PDA side because socially I’m just not equal. That is an important thing to be if you want to get anywhere in life. I try my best without that part of me but I can never reach a high level of influence out in the world. I have to settle for something less than my actual potential because this flaw in me as a person. Social belonging is a huge part of life and I can’t figure that bit out due to my difficulties. I’ll never have the natural skills socially that others take for granted. I can try to fill in gaps but I’ll never totally fill those areas where I lack. I can try to influence people despite my social incapacities. I’m just saying that I can’t work miracles. I can’t even get people to do things that I need doing so it’s kind of pot luck to get the right individuals to see my blog etc.

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