I got a letter from ESA this morning. It was the one I’ve been dreaded for many weeks after PIP took my disability status away. It is as severe as I feared. I am only getting just over 200 pound per fortnight now. I cannot possibly live on that and pay my rent too. I have had my rent dropped to single room rate because of losing my disability status and not being over 35 years old. I cannot afford to be squeezed any tighter financially. It’s tight enough already before they dropped it. I know I’m in the work related activity group, but lets face it I am probably better off in the support group at the moment because no one will employ me for the foreseeable future and I’m also an exhausted hormonal mess due to illness.
I have the appeal documents for PIP a few days ago but that could take months to actually get a tribunal date. I’m trying my best to survive on very little income. But I am only getting about £500 a month now. The majority of that is spent on rent. That’s not even taking into consideration bills. I have tried to cut my expenditure on bills but I can’t reel in my spending any further. The gas and electric is expensive with all the energy companies now.
I don’t want to move at this point because I don’t feel like I should leave Dave (cat) behind. I won’t be able to take him with me. I have to take my own cats with me and they can live at a relatives if I actually become homeless at any point. I’m quite fed up now I’ve spoken to a few males with the exact same diagnosis as me and they’ve got more benefits than I’ve ever got. One is even exempt from car tax. He didn’t have to go to tribunal and go through all that stress to justify his disabilities. They get so much more money than I ever did and they didn’t lose out. They had people fighting on their behalf though. That is something I’ve never managed to be able to get due to not having much family back up and an MP who doesn’t do anything but forward letters to departments. Also, I do feel that it is a gender issue because I had a friend who got £200 more than me on DLA and we had exactly the same issues. However, he doesn’t drive and is on more medication. I’m fed up of struggling and every time I ask those around me for help I get turned on rather than helped.
If I could get a job then I would literally tell the benefits system to go take a running jump. However, it’s difficult to get a chance from people because they see my record and my disability and it seems far too much hassle for them.
Diary of a Painfully Shy Introvert Blog 