Getting back into a routine. And there is a few changes.

I went to the Gym tonight. I’m getting back into it and have already lost about  2lbs, however, this is most likely water weight because it is that time all us girls really find irritating (especially if we experience it more severe). I’m taking the opportunity to go the Gym before that really gets going. I hope it isn’t going to kick off like it normally does because I can’t be out of action this week. I have to go to an appointment to get help filling my form in for personal independence payment. I can’t miss that because it was hell getting an appointment. I have already had to extend my form deadline time because of lack of available appointments.

I now have to go to see CAB about my potential housing issues to see if I can get a plan together in case my landlord decides he’s going to sell the flat. I also need to see how I apply for extra rent allowance because of the increase. I have worked out I can afford it even if pip gets awkward and refuses me those payments. I have known others that applied for extra money for the rent because of the increases, I would just rather have a professional fill out all the forms for me because they are trained to do those things at CAB. I also know that if the form is filled out by an organisation on behalf of the claimant then there is less resistance giving you what you’re entitled to by law. That is a theory but with the most ignorant and stubborn organisations it sometimes doesn’t work.

I also have decided that I’m no longer going to take any mistreatment from others. I have deleted a blocked the Facebook account that the other persons friend (involved in legal case). The one they made to spy on me. I didn’t like the feeling I got off of them. Remember I can feel others energy, and even the person themselves kind of had an aura around them that caused me to feel a sense of fear. I’m not looking to converse with superficial people who don’t give a damn about hurting other people. The other person doesnt know what it feels like to have no one because they have lots of friends and they all have each other. None of them know what it’s like not to have barely anyone to spend their birthdays with etc. They cannot relate to my reality as an autistic person. I just want real people around me. As a child and adult that grew up within the system all I saw was fakery and surrounded by others who didn’t really give a damn about me. I was treated like I did what I did on purpose. I didn’t have those social skills and that wasn’t my fault. It’s just come out about the lack of support and right intervention for adults on the autistic spectrum and the associated suicide level being very high amongst those on the spectrum. And I was accused of being selfish and trying to commit suicid just to get back at the other person. The truth was completely different. I was driven to that desperate act.