Suspicions

We have just had Friday 13th pass and there were some that did believe, but also many skeptics. I’m quite open minded when it comes to signs. But on the odd occasion I get freaked out. I may be being over sensitive and downright stupid but I’m not sure.

I got home after my day and out of no where my spell cast lucky charm which I have attached to my bag completely broke apart. It was far too sturdy to have broken so easily. I never pulled on it or anything. It was just like it had just crumbled randomly. I don’t know whether to get worried or just try to put it out of my mind and hope that I don’t get bad luck. I got the charm to attempt to improve my situation. Obviously, I cannot prove whether it had any effect on how things materialised. Maybe it’s also a sign that I shouldn’t base too much thinking on the numbers that I see. They may or may not mean something but it’s not something I should get stressed about. I saw 333 and 2323 today. In all honesty I was far too busy rushing around to notice a lot. I saw 4 magpies in a group the other day. This is unusual because they normally pair up and stay separated. I managed to do a 2 and a half hour walk with my knee swollen, so may be I don’t physically need a lucky charm any longer. The one thing I do understand about all this law of attraction and spiritual level stuff is that everything is set to happen for a reason in order to push us in the direction of our mapped out path. The elements come and go as they need to and that is what happened to my lucky charm when it broke apart. I was judged no longer to need it. I’ve had it since the beginning of this year. It didn’t last long but sometimes beaded things doesn’t stay together long term. I know this from trying to make jewellery. I’m not great at it because I’m out of practice now. I found that I couldn’t study and learn how to make those types of things.

I should have been asleep hours ago because I haven’t slept well in days and didn’t even get a nap today. I did try but I get times when I just can’t settle and that charm breaking really did worry me at first. I’m trying to move on and get away from the past rubbish. I saw the charm bursting apart as some sign that things were going to go pear shaped while I was trying to do that. I’ve calmed down now but still can’t sleep. It’s not even about that now. I just have a lot on and can’t actually ‘switch off’. It doesn’t help that my knee starts hurting after four hours when the painkillers wear off. It wakes me up and I had to try to go for a walk with it because it was hurting more as it was stiffening up due to me not using it. It’s about balancing it out because it keeps the swelling down. I’m not messing about with crutches because it’s just an extra hassle. I don’t want sore hands too. That is what they cause using them for distances. There were times on my walk when I could have done with keeping my weight off of my knee, but I got back and feel better for the fresh air. It’s horrible being stuck in the flat and I actually miss the gym now I’m unable to go. I used to not look forward to my Gym days. But now I kind of miss that routine. A break might do me good. I felt good going the gym but strained at the same time. I do need a major rest right now. I’m not even physically exhausted, it’s more an emotional exhaustion. I get cracks in my nails when I’m stressed and I have a corner split right next to the edge of my  thumbnail. I’m trying to repair my nails with that maximum growth stuff. It won’t get rid of the cracks but it will weave the skin back together underneath to make sure it doesn’t just snap off. Any way I’m off now because it’s stupidly late! Goodnight 🙂